Sometimes, it just feels better to write it out.
Dear Suburban Queen Bee who picks up her kids at the daycare behind my apartment building in a sparkling white Escalade,
All the other parents park at the end of the driveway and walk up to the door to pick up their kids. You are the *only* one who feels entitled enough to drive all the way up the driveway in your fucking monster of a vehicle. I doubt you could even FEEL the jarring motion of running over a small child in that thing due to the lulling comfort of 5 tons of metal. I often wonder at what velocity I would have to pitch my saliva in order to spit on your car from my balcony. I wish there weren't people like you in the world,
Much too sincerely,
Me
P.S. Get off your fucking cell phone.
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